Do you love going out to dinner because of all the people that are going to see you there? Are there one or several men in your life who you refer to as "my promoter friend?" Does your promoter friend Samuel sometimes set up "dinner for you and your girls" before you go clubbing? Are you 42 years old? If the answer to all of these questions is yes, then get ready to read all about Kingside, your new favorite place to drink champagne with food.
Kingside is a restaurant on 57th street in the lobby of the Viceroy, a new hotel that people are describing as "chic," according to the website. Being that we're always interested in new things in Midtown, we stopped in a few times to see what's happening at this "chic" new hot spot, and boooooooy are things happening. This place is a beehive of glammed-up female and single rich dude activity. Unfortunately, what isn't happening is good food. You know things are bad when the most memorable item on the menu are the french fries, which you only ate because you ordered a $21 burger that didn't come stuffed with truffles or money. We stopped in for brunch too for some reason, and the food in daytime hours is no better - everything is still overpriced and underwhelming. At least it comes with a side of hilarious scene.
Food RundownRed Snapper Crudo
The best way to describe this would be to call it a "dry crudo," because it's seasoned with a sort of rub rather than citrus juice. It's an interesting idea, as the pieces of fish are topped with citrus salt, bee pollen, and quinoa. Unfortunately it just isn't that good. The salt and pollen make for a grainy texture with the fish, and we found ourselves wishing we had some lime juice.Grilled Kale
A big bowl of kale salad that's been grilled instead of served raw and served with olives and goat cheese. It's fine, but it's also not great and all kinds of wet, instead of crispy. You certainly won't be dying to eat it again someday.Grilled Octopus
Served with crispy chorizo and patatas bravas, we were pretty excited to eat this. We ended up sending it back. The octopus was mushy, and bogged down in some kind of soupy Romesco sauce. No thank you.Kingside Burger
As previously mentioned, this thing is $21, and nothing about it has been dry aged, imported from Japan, or steeped in rare congac. Nothing about it is memorable either. Except maybe the fries.Butter Lettuce Salad
Maybe six piece of butter lettuce, with nothing else other than dressing, for $13. What a deal.Everything Cured Salmon
This dish is a joke. A tiny portion of salmon, which you can't even tell is cured, sprinkled with everything bagel toppings. The texture is weird, the flavor is off and nothing about this dish is edible.Peppers & Eggs
A big floppy sandwich off eggs and peppers. Not bad, but at $16 for an egg sandwich, we were looking for something next level. Our favorite part is that our server asked us if we wanted fries with it, to which we obviously said sure. They forgot to mention those fries cost $10. TEN DOLLARS! For a side of fries. That's just not right.Maple Bacon + Avocado Sandwich
A pretty simple sandwich of bacon and avocado with a couple slices of tomato, you know, something that should always cost $16.Kingside Waffle
Hard, flavorless waffles that Eggo takes to school. They should be embarrassed.Cast Iron Frittata
You could tell whoever was on this in the kitchen had no idea what they were doing, because the top was crispy, the bottom was hot, but not cooked, and the insides were a runny, uncooked mess. Or was that you, Marc Murphy? We highly doubt it.