MIAReview
Dinner at Nossa Omakase would just be another laughably ridiculous South Beach dining experience if it wasn’t for the fact that it is literally Miami’s most expensive omakase. For $345 to over $400 per person, one might understandably expect a thoughtful meal consisting of rare fish flown in from Japan, sushi rice that’s perfect down to each individual grain, or just a general display of creativity and kitchen skills that warrant spending this kind of money.
Instead, Nossa’s customers get two painfully slow hours of watching caviar, truffle, and uni suffer. The only somewhat impressive thing about Nossa is the confidence with which it ruins very expensive ingredients.
Guide
The Best Sushi Omakase Restaurants In Miami
An evening at this unjustifiably expensive South Beach speakeasy begins with a welcome glass of prosecco in the bar area, a very dark room that smells like an amalgamation of all the lowest-selling Yankee Candles. Guests are eventually herded towards the melodramatic dining room, a shadowy space with semicircular counter seating and little spotlights that hit each plate, so you can see, in vivid detail, just how disappointingly bland each dish is.
There are around 16 to 18 courses served for Nossa’s $345 Evening Omakase experience. They are all dramatically narrated by the chef, who won’t hesitate to publicly interrogate a customer about why they were in the bathroom so long.
And yet no amount of caviar or truffle can help this poor food. Thick slabs of sashimi are sliced with the knife skills of Norman Bates. Certain pieces of “nigiri” are mysteriously served without rice, which turns out to be a blessing since said rice is gummy and cold. The opening courses strive for creativity, but fall flat over and over again—like an egg yolk sandwich served between miniature slices of burnt milk bread that’s as unpleasantly rich as taking a shot of lukewarm butter.
If Nossa Omakase cost $3, we’d still consider standing outside and begging customers to spend their night anywhere else. Please don’t conflate this place’s unrivaled price point with an expectation of quality. The only unique distinction Nossa Omakase earns is that it might be the biggest waste of money in all of South Beach. And that is actually pretty impressive.
Food Rundown
Evening Omakase Experience
Dinner at Nossa starts bad and gets worse. Don’t expect any rare or exciting seafood flown in fresh from a market overseas. Almost every fish served is either tuna or salmon—and it tastes like it was plucked from behind the sneeze guard at the adjacent poke shop Nossa owns. Caviar and truffle are needlessly showered over almost every dish, dry ice and useless smoking contraptions make an appearance, and you will want to cry when your chef, for no reason at all, takes a massive blowtorch to your uni, which burns the flavor off one of the few dishes that would have probably been good had they just left it the hell alone. Dessert is a scoop of rapidly melting coconut ice cream topped with, obviously, caviar. It is the most pleasant course only because it means dinner is finally over.
