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Nico serves delicious food, but this restaurant is clearly designed for old people.

OK, not, like, super old. But this is definitely one of the "Dinner with the Parents" capitals of San Francisco. It's in Pac Heights, for starters, which we're pretty sure requires two strollers, a senior card, and 20 million dollars to settle down in. The tables may be exposed wood but they feel like they should have white tablecloths.

The food is similarly fancy. The oysters come down on a bed of exposed rocks that we're pretty sure were smoothened by ancient river water. The dessert parfaits use nonsensical French monikers (seriously, what is a chiboust?).

But we will let this all slide, because the food is really good. The salmon was perhaps the most attractive shade of red-pink we've seen on a slab of fish. The aforementioned oysters got it done, big time. And despite the aged patrons, we had a great time. (Not to say that's not possible. We have nothing against our elders! We're just trying to convey the vibe, people.)

So should you go to Nico? Absolutely. We just don't recommend it for Action At The Bar or Early In The Game Dates. It's more of a high-school graduation kind of scene, or a Wednesday night out with Old Money, if you know any. (If you do, hook us up.)

Food Rundown


Four beautiful oysters, arrayed as four points of the compass. Thumbs up.

Squash Beignets

Four beautiful squash doughnuts, arrayed as four points of a pyramid. The Egyptians would be jealous.


The color of red that you'd be afraid to cook it to at home, but is a DELIGHT in a restaurant. So fresh. These people know their fish.


Even redder than the salmon. Delicious as well.


Basically a pile of delicious clementine-orange-flavored cream in a cup. With layers! Amazingly good, even if this the only time in our lives we've heard this word.

S'more-like thing

Gonna be real with people — we were pretty intoxicated at this point in the meal. We ate something akin to a s'more pastry with caramelized meringue/marshmallow fluff on top of it. The internet has no record of such a dish existing, so this is the best we can do. Rest assured, it was the perfect capstone to the meal.

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