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The San Francisco Delivery Guide

PHOTO: Krescent Carasso

There are days when locating the Apple TV remote can feel like climbing Mount Everest. Dragging yourself off the couch to deal with dinner? Not on your life - it’s time to start reaping the benefits of the on-demand economy. But just because you can get anything you desire delivered, doesn’t mean you should. We’ve whittled down the contenders to a list of options that travel well, arrive quickly, and will allow you to re-focus your energy on remembering your ex-boyfriend’s klepto roommate’s HBO GO password.

Souvla

Hayes Valley
517 Hayes St.
8.4
MAP

Souvla is a Greek institution in San Francisco, if you can call a place open since 2014 an institution. It’s stationed in all of the cool pockets of the city and has a cultish following without any of the required reading or indentured slavery of say, Scientology. It’s exactly what you order when you don’t want to think about what to order, because the wraps and salads are really good, the lamb and chicken hold up while en route, and the baklava is unreal.

Uva Enoteca

Haight
568 Haight St

Uva Enoteca is a great pick after a big night, when you need to eat yourself into a catatonic state and sleep off the rest of your hangover. The meatballs are delicious, as is pretty much everything else on the menu. Gluten intolerance might be our generation’s bubonic plague but Uva is non-partisan in the war on gluten and offers really good GF pasta too.

Waiting in line for Señor Sisig at Off The Grid is certifiably insane, so a San Francisco life hack is to get it delivered. That way you can enjoy your California Sisig burrito (with fries and extra sriracha) in peace, without being mowed over by strollers and/or very determined picnickers.

4505 Burgers & BBQ

Nopa
705 Divisadero St.
8.3
MAP

4505 is home to what is easily one of the best burgers in SF, as well as some top notch fries, but the meat spread should not be ignored, and is a way better option for delivery. The brisket and pork shoulder will send you into a sunken place if you start pondering how vegetarians live their lives with so much unfulfilled potential. It generally arrives pretty quickly, so you can devour some of the best BBQ around without having to deal with the 4505 indoor/outdoor free-for-all seating.

Photo: 4505 / Facebook

Chubby Noodle

Marina
2205 Lombard St.
7.9
MAP

Most people go to Chubby Noodle for bottomless brunch or a solid pregame, but these activities overshadow the fact that the food here is actually really good. The garlic noodles and fried chicken combo are the perfect hangover antidote and the small plates (particularly the pork tacos) are great to share with a bigger group.

Photo: Chubby Noodle / Facebook

Everyone knows that SF is where bagels and delis come to die, but Miller’s is the perfect choice if you’re looking for a breakfast sandwich to get delivered (go with the pastrami instead of bacon). It’s also a nice respite from the artisanal sandwiches that are inescapable in this town.

Photo: Miller's / Facebook

Roam has all of the things you love about a fast food burger, but without the pigeon talons and ground up Beanie Babies. All the meat they use is grass-fed, free range, and probably sent to hospice care in Malibu before ending up at Roam and you can taste it. The bison burger is worth a try and the milkshakes are absurdly good. Plus, getting it delivered means you can skip the scene and a half that usually goes down here.

Loving Cup

Hayes Valley
535 Octavia St
MAP

Loving Cup has frozen yogurt and rice pudding that is perfect for movie dates, or if you hit your vape a little too hard and need something sweet before the paranoia sets in. It separates itself from the pack because the toppings are mixed into the yogurt, and flavors like Dirty Hipster (nutella and oreos) and Strawberry Shortcake (animal crackers and strawberries) are guaranteed to satisfy even the worst case of the munchies.

Photo: Loving Cup / Facebook
8.2
MAP

All of the pastries at Craftsman and Wolves are offensively good. The kouign amann and Rebel Within (a biscuit with cooked egg inside) are perfect pastry specimens, and the thought of not having to deal with the Mission craziness on a Sunday morning is enough to get you over the hurdle of paying more for delivery than you should.

San Francisco has a weird relationship with pizza, but Presidio is one of those Silicon Valley unicorns where you can order by the slice, get delivery late at night, and actually receive something edible.

Mission Chinese serves bar none some of the best, and most numbingly spicy, Chinese food in the city. They categorize themselves as “weird Chinese” and it definitely feels weird to see pastrami on a Chinese menu, but good weird - like when Emma Watson tries to do an American accent. Any menu that has thrice cooked bacon is on the right side of history, especially when you can eat it on your couch.

7.5
MAP

Blue Barn is like Panera, except for people with working tasting buds (and slightly larger wallets). The build-your-own salad situation is unparalleled and they don’t skimp on the avocado, but if you’re looking for something a little heartier (read: not at all good for you), you can’t go wrong with the truffle sandwich and a side of fries.

Photo: Krescent Carasso
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