LDNGuide
Where To Take The Plant Person In Your Life
One day you’re buying a cactus in Urban Outfitters and the next you have a colour-coordinated twine system to ensure that your ficus-pruning regimen is flawless. Yes, becoming a plant person is a slippery slope and whether it’s happened to you or you're a bystander to your mate’s new Planta habit, we’re here to help. How? By providing great food and foliage of course.
The Spots
For anyone who has ‘own greenhouse’ on their bucket list
One word. Greenhouse. Technically, a compound noun but honestly, who cares. Greenhouses are the crème de la crème of plant life. Chameleon in Marylebone is a restaurant that understands this. Their big ‘God’s Garden’ is packed full of charming greenhouses, some designed for long sharing tables and some little ones that house exactly one table. That’s right, your own private greenhouse. Expect za’atar, aubergine carpaccio, and some of London’s best bread in the form of a rich, fluffy brioche that comes with a highly-dippable zhug.
For those who confuse owning a plant with being a real adult
To be honest, we don’t disagree with them. So if all they want to do lately is look through a Wickes catalogue or pretend to like filter coffee, don’t try to stop them. Instead bring them to this adorable garden shop, cafe, and teahouse in Richmond where you can share a slice of cake, some herbal tea, and spend hours basking in the idyllic floral courtyard. Booking afternoon tea here for your plant-parent friend is a fantastic shout.
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For people who wish ivy could grow on humans
OTT bottle displays and creamy truffle pasta isn’t the only thing this Italian restaurant in Fitzrovia is good for. The foliage here makes itself known before you even step foot inside. The building is covered in greenery and any spot that isn’t blanketed with vines makes up for it with enormous plant pots lined up outside the windows. The dining room has ivy and various other pretty plants hanging from the ceilings—the perfect backdrop for one of Circolo's I Wanna Nduja pizzas and tableside carbonara. Not only that, but if you pass the huge dining room and head through the back, you’ll find a cosy terrace, filled with yet more plants. Eat some pasta, share a pizza, and try to stop your friend from stuffing one of the small plant pots in their bag.
For coffee lovers who are in the market for a sexy new snake plant
Seeing as caffeine and actually keeping plants alive are the true markers of adulthood in the 21st century, this café’s concept is a real winner. Some might call it a plant shop with a coffee counter. Others might call it a coffee shop with some added classic swiss cheese plants for sale. We call it genius. As well as the great selection of plants, you can get a long black for as little as £2.50 and they have a changing array of sweet pastries. Find them on Westminster Bridge Road in Waterloo and know that the coffee genuinely is great.
For plant nerds who also happen to like pints
This Old Street pub has a garden on their roof where they grow and harvest fresh produce for the restaurant and bar. If you’re a plant person, you’ll be obsessed with their mechanical plant air conditioning units. If you’re someone with a track record of foliage murder, you’ll really like the views. All the pub bev classics are covered from beers to spritzes and it’s worth getting involved in their mediterranean-leaning rooftop menu. Also, if you’ve been doing some hot plant-related flirting on a dating app, know that this rooftop is perfect for a date in the sunshine.
For cactus enthusiasts
If your friend is going to spend 70% of the evening discussing the fact that cactus thorns are actually little spines, you might as well pretend to care with a pork belly taco in your hand and a stunning view of the King’s Cross clock tower in front of you. Head to the 10th floor of The Standard, London where you can do exactly that. It’s got floor-to-ceiling windows, two big buzzing bars, skyline views, and—most importantly—six-foot cacti. It’s also blindingly expensive, so if you come here be prepared to throw down £100 per person on caviar-topped tortillas and a couple of cocktails.
For lovers of pastas and peonies
We once called this place the beautiful lovechild of a spa and a florist, and when you see its outdoor set-up you’ll understand why. The flowers, Italian-esque garden, hell—even the backs of the chairs are metal mouldings in the shape of leaves. Basically, as far as a great summer day out, this will be up there with your Kew Gardens excursion last summer, unless you get seated inside. So don’t let that happen. Book a table outside, order the ravioli if it’s on, and make a mental note of your favourite plants for your unnecessary trip to B&Q on the way home.
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For anyone with a Pinterest dedicated exclusively to whimsical cherry blossom pics
Cherry blossom pic for plant-obsessive. Pineapple miso highball for you. Another cherry blossom pic for plant-obsessive. California maki for you. Yet another cherry blossom pic for plant-obsessive. Yet another cocktail for you. See how this is all working out? Shochu Lounge is a very pink and very pretty cocktail bar underneath Fitzrovia sushi spot, Roka. The cherry blossom energy here is off the charts and the drinks and fishy snacks are reliably decent. Is the cherry blossom real? Absolutely not. Will you care? Also no.
For the plant person who has an “online presence” (a.k.a. 300 Instagram followers)
The truth is you don’t even need to necessarily be a “plant person” to enjoy this foliage-filled restaurant. But you do have to appreciate beautiful things. Like artsy light fittings and hot pink lampshades, and a dressed-up take on a chicken kiev. While the brasserie classics here are perfectly nice, albeit pricey, you’re not here for the food—because ultimately that’s the least of your concerns when you’re surrounded by this much flawless leafage.
Dom's For people who can’t keep plants alive but are really, really trying
Sorry but whatever magical zest for survival the weeds in our garden have, our azaleas do not have it. There is only so much heartbreak one person can take and following a succession of stinky brown-leaf tragedies, we must all just accept that no matter how many gardening stan accounts we follow, our fingers are simply not green. That’s where Dom’s Subs comes in. Partly because this tiny Hackney Road spot serves the kind of hefty deli-style sandwiches that could cure almost any bout of sadness through the medium of 10/10 crust, mortadella, and salami—but mostly because it’s right next to Columbia Road Flower Market. Forget plants. Buy nice flowers. Embrace the fact that they will inevitably turn stinky in three to six business days. Move on with your life, importantly, while eating the best subs in London.
