The best thing about doing brunch at home is that the mimosas aren’t the only thing that can be bottomless - you can be, too. So the next time the weekend rolls around, grab something from one of the spots below, pour yourself some morning booze, and then Zoom with six of your friends to virtually recreate the awkwardness of trying to split a check six ways when Katie only ordered egg whites on toast and swears she didn’t touch the truffle fries.
The chef at Juliet, one of the best restaurants in Boston, has sewn homemade masks for the entire staff. Either that melts your heart, or you’re the type of person who unironically quotes Wall Street. Don’t unironically quote Wall Street - do order one of Juliet’s family brunches for takeout, which include things like breakfast tacos and caramelized grapefruit.
The menu at the Neighborhood Restaurant, a kind-of-Portuguese place in Union Square, changes almost daily. But you can always count on giant plates of comforting breakfast food. If the Portuguese breakfast with linguica and cod cakes is available, get it. But even if it’s not, you’ll find plenty of great options like cinnamon bun french toast or huevos rancheros. They’re doing both takeout and delivery.
Save your own hot sauce - you’re going to need something to add flavor to the dinners of saltines and bologna that are in your future. Instead, call up the Met and order a Bloody Mary kit for curbside pickup. Food is also an important part of brunch (theoretically), so maybe also get the pulled pork hash.
If Bloody Marys aren’t your thing, give Barra in Union Square a call. This brand new cocktail bar is selling some great brunch cocktail mixers, including palomas, micheladas, and clamachelas, in addition to the standard mimosa and bellini bundles.
Brassica Kitchen & Cafe
Brassica in JP has some of the best donuts in Boston, but don’t stop there. Get the excellent (and spicy) fried chicken and waffles, too. Both delivery and pickup are available.
We love the breakfast sandwiches at Mike & Patty’s so much that we put it on our main brunch guide, even though there are only four chairs in the entire place. But since none of us will be sliding into a booth anytime soon, you have even more reason to order from this counter-service spot. Get the breakfast crack sandwich delivered or pick it up.
Unfortunately, you can’t pick up the best thing about brunch at Darryl’s in Roxbury: the seven-piece jazz fusion bands. But you can get the shrimp and okra stew and then maybe try your hand at the kazoo or something. Everything’s available for either delivery or takeout.
Since time is now relative for all of us, in a way we’ve all become human versions of all-day breakfast places. Savin Hill’s McKenna’s Cafe, though has been doing it for longer, so they’re probably better at it. The whole greasy spoon menu, which has a ton of omelets, is available for either delivery or pickup.
Trident Booksellers & Cafe
Generally speaking, we like Trident more as a bookstore than a restaurant. But now that we need books to keep us sane as well as food to keep us alive, this place is more important than ever. Give them a call to get some smoked salmon scramble (they do both delivery and pickup) and grab yourself something to read, too (though maybe leave the dystopian stuff for another time).
Maybe you haven’t escaped to a farm in New Hampshire to ride out the quarantine. But order the buttermilk flapjacks from Saloniki for either takeout or delivery, warm up some syrup, and say to your roommate, “Hey, roommate, it’s buttermilk flapjack time!” There - doesn’t that sound like the type of thing people on New Hampshire farms say?
Your eye will immediately be drawn to the lobster avocado omelet when you look at the Cafe Luna menu because, you know, lobster avocado omelet. But keep looking until you find something made with the slow-cooked corned beef hash (there are multiple options). Hash is your friend. Hash makes you happy. Hash is available via either takeout or delivery on the weekend.
Puritan & Co. is bold enough to serve you mustard ice-cream, which is either an ingenious gamble or a scene right out of Black Mirror, depending on your personal taste. That frozen condiment isn’t on the new takeout brunch menu (sadly), but there are things like corn beef and beets hash and Meyer lemon bostock. Visit their website to pre-order.
Maybe you’ve known about Milkweed’s Lucky Charm pancakes for a while now. But you’ve always resisted the urge to order them because the world has told you to grow up and not act like a two year old. You know what - paying bills and pretending to listen to your sister drone on about her third virtual date really is no fun. Just get those pancakes, and let out the loudest socially unacceptable scream you can muster.
Pomegranate molasses and mint sound like ingredients that would pair well together in your next cocktail or the startup toothpaste company you’ve always wanted to run. They’re also found on the hummus toast at Lulu Green, served with dates on a za’atar focaccia. Smoothies, pastries, coffee, and dishwashing detergent (we’re not sure why) are also available Wed-Sun for takeout.
Monument Restaurant & Tavern
Your significant other professes their love for brunch, but always orders two eggs, bacon, and plain toast. Apparently it just tastes better “when someone else makes it - no offense honey.” Maybe you like a little more variety in your meals though. Grab takeout or delivery from Monument in Charlestown, where there’s a wide range of options. Lobster corn chowder? Check. Breakfast pizza? Check. Blackberry margarita kits? Yeah, they have those too, available on Saturdays from 10am-3pm.
Irish spot The Dogwood in JP has brunch for takeout and delivery on the weekends. There’s colcannon on the menu - which we haven’t come across at any other place - as well as potato pancakes, breakfast pizza, and basically any other type of pizza you would want.
Vegetables are hard to come by these days, and sorry, the Tostitos salsa you’re spooning directly from the jar doesn’t count (scientists insist that tomatoes are fruits, and they usually know what they’re talking about). But the full brunch menu is available at Red Lentil Watertown, one of the city’s best vegetarian restaurants. Get waffles, frittatas, and nachos via either takeout or delivery.
Harry's All-American Breakfast
A long time ago, some incompetent government officials probably made the decision that brunch should only be served on the weekends. What they didn’t foresee was an invisible virus that would allow professional meetings to be conducted in bed at 11am, and thus the corresponding masses in need of french toast and omelettes on Wednesdays. That’s why we’re glad we have Harry’s in Roslindale, open every day from 7am to 2pm.
If one of the city’s best restaurants is offering brunch to-go and you don’t order it, well, that’s one way to exercise your free will. But in Plato’s perfect republic, the citizens are served Toro’s chorizo empanadas, maiz asado, and patatas bravas weekly. Which explains why they’re so damn happy all the time. Join the republic by ordering between 10am-2pm on Saturday and Sundays.
If there’s a record for “number of fried things you can order for brunch,” it must have been set at Highland Fried. Between the wings, chicken thighs, and fries, you’ll probably be pretty full. If not, there are always biscuits, brisket sandwiches, and smoked ribs too - all available via takeout and delivery on Saturdays from 11am-2:30pm.
Yes, the brunch menu at Stillwater is small, but size doesn’t really matter here. If you’re like us, you’ll be getting the tater tots with smoked pulled pork and poached eggs, with vanilla ricotta donut holes and a Guinness float on the side. Sometimes it’s easier to let someone else make the decisions for you.
We’re already big fans of the pasta dishes at Coppa, but now that they have a crispy potato cake with scallion aioli and Little Donkey’s chicken and waffle, we might have to start calling them on weekend mornings too. Or we could just have leftover rigatoni in bed, which is pretty satisfying - at least until we have to scrub tomato sauce off the sheets.