NYCReview
photo credit: Noah Devereaux
Roll N Roaster
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The next time you pass any fast food place, walk inside and ask for a bottle of champagne, a cup of melted cheese, and a free thin-crust pizza. You will, most likely, be escorted from the building. But there’s a place where you can fulfill all these desires. A place where melted cheese is as plentiful as tap water and everyone gets a free pizza after spending $40. It’s called Roll N Roaster, and it’s somewhere you should have on your to-visit list alongside iconic spots like P.J. Clarke’s and Peter Luger.
Roll N Roaster is a fast food place in Sheepshead Bay that specializes in roast beef sandwiches, and it’s been open since 1971. It’s sort of like if the original Arby’s went rogue and started exhibiting a reckless amount of personality, and you get the impression that it hasn’t really changed in the past 40+ years. If you live nearby, there’s a good chance you have fond memories of deep-fried childhood meals here, and if you’ve never heard of this place, you should map out a route and head over one weekend for a quick lunch before hitting the beach.
From the outside, Roll N Roaster looks like something you’d find on a road trip through the American Southwest sometime during the Carter administration. It’s a big building with striped yellow awnings and several American flags flying from the roof, and when you walk in you’ll find a massive dining space with bright yellow tables, wood-paneled walls, and heavy glass light fixtures that wouldn’t feel out of place in a bachelor’s home in the year 1975. At the back, there’s usually a small crowd - whether it’s lunch or 1am - either staring up at a large menu or waiting for their food.
If you’re sufficiently observant, it should only take you a few seconds to realize that the roast beef sandwich is a must-order. It comes on a big roll dipped in gravy for $6.45, and for 50 cents extra, you can get it topped with melted cheese the texture of a microwaved G.I. Joe. Do this, or face shame, ridicule, and years of crippling regret. You should also get some cheese on your fries - which are the ovular cottage-style ones you find at a place like JG melon - as well as an additional side of cheese for your creamy corn fritters. (Cheese, if you hadn’t noticed, is an essential part of the Roll N Roaster experience.) To facilitate digestion, add a big lemonade or a strawberry milkshake - or, if you recently collected all the loose change hidden throughout your house, go for a bottle of Moet. We aren’t sure why, but they sell that here - and it’s one of the many reasons why we’re emotionally attached to this place.
Unless you have a phobia of a shiny melted cheese or your life-coach-slash-interior-designer recently told you to avoid all places with mustard-yellow color schemes, you’re going to have a good time at Roll N Roaster. This place serves some of the best fast food in the city, along with beers for $2.95 - $3.50 and $60 bottles of champagne. Factor in the decor that makes you feel like you tripped into a wormhole and fell out on the other side of 1980, and you have a New York City classic where you can have an experience you never knew you needed.